The Power Fade Golf Blog

Happy Am-exit day, everyone!  In the spirit of the occasion, the PowerFade team has decided to do something that the country as a whole is threatening to do: when faced with mass hysteria about the state of an alleged problem, we’re going to throw out everything anyone has ever done to try to fix a problem and replace it with an entirely new regime that has never been tried or tested.  In this case, we’re talking about the rules of golf.

In the wake of yet another rules fiasco at the U.S. Open that could have cost Dustin Johnson yet another U.S. Open title, several questions keep coming to mind: why are the rules of golf so damn hard to understand?  Shouldn’t they be easier to understand?  Why isn’t the USGA following their own rules?  And most important: are the arcane and unapproachable rules contributing to why golf is falling off in popularity in this country and around the world?

After discussions between JK, LG, and the AMTP, we have devised a set of rules for the weekend golf crew that we think will make golf fun again.  Disclaimer: in order to prevent these rules from becoming as cumbersome as “the Rules of Golf,” we have assumed a certain amount of knowledge of the “Rules” and of golf in general.  We’re not a rules making body, and the scores that result from playing with our versions should not be posted for handicap purposes.  Read: You’ll end up losing a lot of money in your regular $2 nassau if you start posting these scores, so don’t do it.

Rules of PowerFade Golf

Goals of our rules: Make golf faster, more fun, and keep it in the spirit of the game.

1. The Game:
   1. …it’s golf.  Hit the ball into the hole in as few strokes as possible.
2. Playing the game:
   1. Winter rules apply everywhere – No bad lies.  If you roll into a divot off the tee – move it.  If you get a fried egg in a bunker, roll it out, but stay in the bunker.  If you get a gnarly lie in the rough, improve it.  Mud ball? clean it.
3. Scoring
   1. No penalty shots will be assessed for hitting into or out of hazards.  Not even if you ground your club in a bunker.
   2. All marked or staked hazards/Out of bounds will be played as lateral hazards if possible.  This means drop it within approximately two flag sticks of the nearest point you think it went into the hazard.
   3. If it is not possible to play a hazard/OB, yell over at your opponent and come to a fast and reasonable agreement about where you should play from.  Remember, karma is a bitch.
   4. On the green: only intentional putts count toward your stroke total.  If the ball moves closer to the hole at address without an intentional stroke, move it back to where it was.  If it moves away from the hole, play it as it lies.
   5. On the green: no more than 3 putts are allowed.  If you reach the green in 1 shot, the worst you can do is 4.  Once you reach 3 putts, pick up.  If the greens have been punched in the last 3 weeks, automatic two putts are mandatory.
   6. Once you reach 8 strokes, pick up.  If you both reach 8 strokes, the hole is pushed.
4. Tees: Any set of tees that are 6,400 yards or shorter.  It may help to modify the scorecard by tearing off the top two sets of tees that are no longer relevant, or even part of the course, as far as you are concerned.
5.  Equipment
   1. No limit on the number of clubs in your bag.  (You’re welcome, Phil)
   2. You may only use one putter per hole (no switching putters between putts).  (Sorry, Phil)
   3. You may NOT adjust an adjustable club during the round.
6. Time of play: 15 minutes per hole or fewer.  There’s no scoring penalty for violating this rule, but don’t be a pill.  If your group violates this rule more than once in a given match, each member of the group must donate $5 to the local First Tee organization per violation.  If, at any point during the match, the total amount of the bets placed on the first tee has been exceeded by repeated violations of the $5 rule, any member of the group that has not already deposited his or her clubs in the nearest lake should do so, and everyone should trudge into the bar so as not to have wasted the entire Saturday.
7. In general, discrepancies that are not addressed by the rules should be handled with common sense.  To the extent common sense is not available, trial by combat is appropriate, assuming no violation of Rule 6.

Next up: The PowerFade team reviews how well the rules accomplished their objectives by playing a round or two using them.  Please feel free to post your own reviews in the comments below if you use these rules during your next round!  If you’re going to troll this, please do so in a way that makes us laugh 🙂